My Dad

I received a phone call at 6am on May 8th. It was from my brother and he didn't sound good. He informed me that my father was being taken by ambulance to the hospital. He wasn't sure what shape he was in but he had suffered a heart attack.

I am almost ashamed to admit that I was very hesitant in going to the hospital. I figured he'd be alright and I didn't need to be there for that. If you have followed this blog, you will know that my relationship with me Dad was not the greatest. I went for 2 reasons. 1 - He is my Dad, no matter what has happened in the past. 2 - My brother needed me to be there. He was not handling it well at all.

I rushed to the hospital as fast as I could. The whole while my mind was going over my life. All the things that have happened between us. I wasn't sure that I was ready to hear what was going to happen. When I arrived there my brother met me outside. I knew from the look on his face that it wasn't good. He told me that Dad hadn't made it. He suffered a massive heart attack.

I'm not sure what to think, what to feel, what to do. As much as he pissed me off, I love him. Up until I was 15, he was there for me. For awhile, it was just him and I. On the same note, I am mad at all the things that happened. What he did to my Grandmother and what little money she had, what happened to my Grandparents things, what he did to me financially, my house he never got to see, my kids he never got to know. It wasn't fair. He made his life with his new wife and left behind his real family. His flesh and blood. He did it to John, and then he did it to me. His 2 only flesh and blood sons and he walked away. It's just not fair.

But, he is my Dad.

Even in death he came out smelling like a rose. His funeral was paid for, his plot was bought. A headstone will be put up. Paid for, not by insurance, not by a generous wife and her family but by my brother and I. We did it all. We picked everything out, planned every bit, called all the family we could. He never paid for the remainder of my Grandmothers funeral so in order for him to be taken care of properly, we had to pay that too. I didn't have $11,000. My brother didn't have $11,000. Who the hell has that kind of money just laying around in this day and age. We did the only thing we could do and pulled it from our retirement. We could have had him cremated and spared the funeral all together. It would have been so much cheaper, so much easier.

But, he is my Dad.

I'm not sure how I feel. I think I mentioned that before. I find myself thinking about him all the time. Like now, he is on my mind and it eats me up inside. My Dad taught me many things in my life that I will never forget. Never start a fight but, if you end up in one, finish it. Never name a child after yourself. Pay your bills, they don't ever go away. Never ever walk out on your children, ever! And the one thing he taught me at the end, tell those people close to you that you love them every day. One day you will wake up and they won't be there any more.

I love you Dad!

Better

I got my washer fixed! $200 to fix, not bad. I figure, hell, if I get another year out of it, I'll be happy. It's old and if I need to buy a new one next year, I will. Problem solved.
I did my taxes and Uncle Sam had to pay up big time so I decided to pay off all my loans and credit cards to free up some money. With the economy the way it is, I'd rather be safe than sorry. I'm in a pretty secure position at my job but you never know. I've seen a good number of people get laid off recently and I'd rather cover my bases.
I was looking at my blog and realized that I don't update too much. I'm not even sure why. I'm on my computer ever single day and have every opportunity to do so. Am I lazy? I have no clue. I think I'm afraid of boring people to death. Running out of things to say. Who knows. I'll try to do better.
I scanned over 300 pictures from old photo albums that my mom had and found some great pictures. Here's one of them.
That's me!
Was I freaking cute or what!
Funny thing is, my boys look identical to me!
Well, without the funky shirt and sweater.

My luck....

I started the New Year out on a positive note financially and knew that this was going to be a better year. Things were looking good right up until I pulled in my garage and my muffler on my car got torn off. Are you kidding me? I knew it was hanging low and planned on getting it taken care of but I guess I was a tad too late.
I took it to the same place I've always taken my vehicles and hoped for the best.
He gave me a quote....
$894
I almost fainted
It had to be done, my rear view mirror was vibrating uncontrollably and my family knew I was coming from a mile away.
Mike (my mechanic) fixed it and told me he saved me some cash.
The total bill...
$504
I wanted to kiss him, but that would be wrong. Very wrong.
So I shook his hand and thanked him instead.

I felt better and cleared my first hurdle of the year. It sucked and set me behind only slightly but it's over with. Fast forward a week and a half, I receive a text from my wife....
Wife: Guess What?
I knew this wasn't gonna be good.
Me: What?
Wife: The washer died!
Me: WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can a grown man cry over a washer? It doesn't matter.... I did anyway. Why me? I guess in a way I expecting it to happen sooner or later, just would have preferred later. It's 11 years old and gets lots of use with 5 people here. My dilemma now is, do I fix it or go buy a new one? My tax return will be here on the 13th. I don't want to put a lot of money into something that may be breaking down a lot in the coming months.
Think I'll buy new.
Now, bad things happen in 3's. What next?

I had a weird dream. It's hard to describe but I found a picture that sums it up.
Man, I have issues!

Oh, one more thing. I think President Obama is gonna do a kick ass job.

2009..... A look ahead

OK, so here it is. 2009! The year of..... something.

I have made several commitments for the year. Let's see how well I keep up with them.

I am going to really get into this blogging thing. I'll review restaurants, pizza joints, bars, amusement parks, gas station bathrooms (trust me, I see alot of them), and anything else that tickles my fancy. Did I say that right? Sounds kinda kinky. Anyway.....

I'm going to spend more time with the important people in my life, particularly my kids.

I'm going to kiss my wife and tell her I love her everyday.

I'm going to be even more successful in my job, and I promise to post funny crap that happens to me in customers homes.

I'm going to be smarter financially while still enjoying life.

I'm going to be more postive and happier in general.

2009 will be a great year.

Oh yeah, I'm gonna mail out Christmas cards this year too!

As for the bigger picture, I hope Obama gets this country out of this economic nightmare that we are in. I know it won't be easy and won't happen overnight but, a positive outlook by all will help immensley. I hope this thing in Iraq comes to a true end. I know we can't just pull our troops out all at once but we need to start bring the troops home. I hope Governor Patterson wakes up and realises how stupid he sounds. New York state is bad enough, we don't need it worse. Does he really want to put an obesity tax on soda? What the hell is that? Ughh.

So, 2009, here I am. Bring it on!